Liars, loyalty and Family Values

So okay. I'm a huge fan of JoeyBlondeWolf2 on YouTube have been since 4 years ago. Recently he came out with two videos about your family member saying they accept who you are and lying about it and also being told by your family that you can't talk about "certain things" because it may make them look bad or maybe thought as inappropriate.

I'm writing this because from my own experience I know how badly this hurts. Luckily for joey the family member he talked about was his Uncle. Mine is my mom.

Okay, to start this off and make this easy let me tell you a little about myself. My name is Kait. I'm 19 years old and have been aware that I like the same sex for the past six years (that's right since I was 13). I ended up being forced to coming out to my mother when I was 15 because she read my journal. At the time I told her I was confused and that I knew i definitely like girls, and her reaction to me was perfect she told me that she loved me no matter what and that she always will and that I was perfectly normal. She told me everything I wanted to hear.

My dad on the other hand had a different reaction. When he found out about me, I was at school and he had came in to give the school a check for my dance uniform (because it was mandatory that girls took dance in my old school). He saw me standing in the hall holding my girlfriends hand and stormed up to us and practically started to screech at me about "how inapporpriate you are?!" and "You disgust me!" and "Just wait till you get home!" So I didn't go home... I went to my friends house and he found me. We were walking up the street from her house and he came up behind me in the car blaring his horn. he pulled up to the side of the road, jumped out of his car, grabbed me by my shirt, through me into the backseat, drove half way down the road pulled over and started to hit me. He called me stupid and said that "no daughter of his was going to be a dyke." and that i was "only pretending to be gay because its cool." He then grounded me for a whole year and bolted my window shut. I was told never to speak to my girlfriend again and if I did I would be in more trouble.

But later that next summer when i was ungrounded I sat down and talked with my dad. He told me how terrible he felt about what happened and that he loved me and was coming to terms with it. I gave him a huge hug. I was so happy to hear that. He then asked "So when do i get to meet your girlfriends?" and I laughed and I'm like "Dad, one step at a time."

He loves me and excepts me now and my step dad is the same way. But something changed in my mother. After moving back to New York to live with her and my step-dad I didn't want to make a big fuss about it because it was a much smaller town then Pasadena. But I confided in one of my cousins that was staying with us that I am a lesbian, and although she told me it was okay, she went around my back and told my mom she didn't feel comfortable sleeping in the same room with me anymore. I hurt 1. because I had confided in her and 2. because my mothers attitude about me was completely flipped. her exact words were "Well I thought it was a phase but i guess i was really really wrong." it crushed me and for the rest of the duration of my cousins stay I was forced to sleep on the couch in the living room while she got my room.

Now every time there's anything remotely about gay people on TV, she changes the channel. If there's a topic on the radio about gays, she changes the station. If her friends start talking about this one gay niece or nephew they have and I'm within ear-shot, she changes the subject. She even refused to watch American idol with me because I'm a fan of Adam Lambert.

Although it's not as drastic anymore she still tells me not to touch my girlfriend in public, not to tell my little brothers, not to talk about it at family events even if I'm asked. All because it will make her look bad.

She even told me not to tell my collage roommates cause it will cause me "problems."

I wish it was better between us. It's like everything I do goes back to me being gay. Being Vegetarian, being an anime addict, loving tattoo artistry. I can't even watch wedding shows or baby shows with out her mentioning how it's NEVER gonna happen.

I hope this all changes back to how she said she was gonna be. But I guess all i can do is hope.

I want to thank Joey for all of his videos and words of "rainbow wisdom" lol. XD There like cheap therapy.

Joey if your reading this Thank you! You give me hope! :)

IM WRITING MY OWN BOOK!!!!!

YEAH!!!! lol Ive finally found an out let! I've started writing a book and I'm really enjoying it. I'm excited because I've written stuff before but this is the first time I've really gotten into it. The book is called the Crimson willow. Its about this girl in high school named Evelin and, not to give too much away, her life is not that great. With troubles at home, her grades getting low and her bully problem she resorts to dreaming up a fantasy world that she keeps in a composition book as her escape, and no one knows of it but her. In her fantasy world she has a beautiful lover named Anya and they always meet under a crimson willow (a willow tree with blood red blossoms). But there's a new girl that comes to her school, and shes just like Anya including her name, whom she falls in love with, but as life gets harder and harder Evelin begins to lose her self in her world. I'll be posting the chapters here on VeggieNinja so you can read it tell me what you think and even help me change it a bit!!! HOPE YOU ALL LOVE IT!!!

Love, Hugs, and Tofu!

VeggieNinja

homophobia at highschool

ok so im a senior now and co president of the schools gsa and I'm starting to notice alot more homophobia at school then I use too. Why? well it could be the fact that someone worte that I was a nasty lesbain on the bathroom wall. At first i was mad but then I thought it was kind of funny cause of the fact that they just so happen to spell my name right... but spelled lesbian L-E-Z-B-I-N.... ??? I was like wait... WTF is a lezbin? lol its kinda sad to see that they werent as focused on calling me nasty then their spelling or maybe they just wanted to look like an ass. lol

Guilt....

I dont always write about my personal life but it seems more recently I have been feeling more and more guilty. Being my moms only daughter and being a lesbian I keep getting the feeling like im letting her down in someway. Like shes never gonna see me marry and me and my partner will never be able to have the same child. Maybe its cause she freaked out over me touching my girlfriends hand or the fact that my grandmothers coming over from england and she is definetly not ok with it and Im really scared its gonna come up. I dont want to lose her in my family. I love her to much for that. *sigh* I guess I just dont know what to do. will this guilt go away? i guess I'll have to see.

FREE HUGS!!! (to be continued)

My friends and I have decide that we want to do the free hugs campaign at the Walmart in Olean NY. It will be fun and make us both feel better about our lives. We don't know an exact date of when but it will be posted soon. If you don't know what free hugs is here's a segment from the site to tell you...

"Free hugs is a real life controversial story of Juan Mann, A man whos sole mission was to reach out and hug a stranger to brighten up their lives. In this age of social disconnectivity and lack of human contact, the effects of the Free Hugs campaign became phenomenal.As this symbol of human hope spread accross the city, police and officials ordered the Free Hugs campaign BANNED. What we then witness is the true spirit of humanity come together in what can only be described as awe inspiring.In the Spirit of the free hugs campaign, PASS THIS TO A FRIEND and HUG A STRANGER!"

to find out more visit: http//:www.freehugscampign.org

Vic Mignogna in Ouran Highschool Host Club??

Ok I'm the hugest Vic fan EVER!! I've seen almost all of his animes like: Fullmetal Alchemist (of course) D.N.Angel 009-1 Air Gear Peach Girl Angelic Layer Bleach Case Closed Madlax One Piece Princess Tutu Noir Yu Yu Hakusho: Ghost Files just to name a few.... and I just wanna ask.....



WHY IF HE HATES YAOI SO MUCH WOULD HE DO THE ONE ANIME THAT IS THE CLOSEST THING TO YAOI WITHOUT ACTUALLY BEING YAOI??????!!!!! *pant pant*


the line up is

J. Michael Tatum - Kyoya
Travis Willingham - Mori
Luci Christian - Honey
Todd Haberkorn and Greg Ayres -Hikaru and Kaoru
Vic Mignogna - Tamaki
Caitlin Glass - Haruhi

Not saying he's great for the part. It's just going to increase his yaoi fangirl base that's all (even more then "ROY MUSTANGE IS DEAD SEXY!!!.... IN A MINI SKIRT!!!!"(see: www.youtube.com/watch?v=etfmWTSnxdw&feature=related).

well I'm sure he has his reasons.... AND I SHALL FIND OUT WHAT THEY ARE!!!!! *MAWHAHAHAHAHA!!!!* *giggles* ^^D

KentuckyFriedCruelty

Make your own KFC sign at peta2.com
Sign by : MEH!!! ^^D

KFC is has always tried to show a the world a much more happier, up beat, gentler side to their resturant. But there is nothing gental about them.

KFC suppliers cram birds into huge waste-filled factories,breed and drug them to grow so large that they can’t even walk,

Find more PETA videos at PETATV.com
and often break their wings and legs.

Find more PETA videos at PETATV.com

In one Missouri Tyson Slaughter house, one PETA undercover investagater documented that live birds were being thrown by workers and crushed by metal dumping machines. Birds were often impaled by mangled transport cages, and workers were instructed to simply yank them out when this happened; PETA's investigator saw workers doing this and found dismembered limbs left behind in cages after the birds had been removed. Birds also got stuck in the spring-loaded doors of the cages, and workers whacked them with metal poles in order to push the doors open, sometimes impaling live birds. One morning, PETA's investigator saw roughly 50 “red birds”—the ones who are scalded to death in defeathering tanks while they're still conscious. This was the THIRD TIME that a KFC “Supplier of the Year” has been exposed for horribly abusing birds.

AND IT'S NOT JUST HERE

The UK, AUSTRALIA, NEW ZEALAND, GERMANY, AND INDIA HAVE ALSO BEEN EXPOSED FOR CRUELTY!!!

FOR MORE INFORMATION AND TO SIGN THE PETITION TO BOYCOTT KFC PLEASE GO TO:
http://www.kentuckyfriedcruelty.com/
http://www.peta2.com/